


You Were so Much Better

by bedpeace



Category: RDR - Fandom, Red Dead Redemption, Red Dead Redemption 2, rdr2 - Fandom
Genre: Other, That's about it tbh, this is placed after rdr2 (duh) so yk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:07:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24956590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bedpeace/pseuds/bedpeace
Summary: The gang split up and now you're looking for Javier, when you see him again, things have obviously changed majorly.
Relationships: Javier Escuella/Reader
Kudos: 18





	1. How Long has it been?

**Author's Note:**

> This started off as tumblr ask I got! But I wanted to bring it here cause, why not. But I am the original creator of this,, dw it's not theft lol. But basically!

It had been quite a few years since the gang had split up. Javier and you had chose different sides, you had begged him to come with you, Micah was a rat. He had already grown too close to Micah, a man who once called him racial slurs and spit at him. He was a fool for trusting him.

After all these years you had went out to find him, maybe he had prospered, and escaped, like Charles, maybe he had a family, a loving wife to come home to from his honest work. Maybe in America, maybe in Mexico. You'd searched from where you last saw him, to Blackwater. The only thing you've managed to find out about him was that he was in Mexico, working with the government now. The government? The same one who screwed over his family? 

You'd set out on going to Mexico, it hadn't been too hard but it was certainly not easy, there were too many people wanting to start a fight for you liking, when you were just looking for one single person. After about a month you had heard someone mention his name in bar you so happened to be in, immediately you went over to them and started to interrogate them.

They finally drunkenly slipped out his location after you bought them one too many rounds for your liking. 

Since you heard his location you hadn't stopped , until you found him. It wasn't anything elegant, but it never was even with Dutch he slept in an open tent. 

You slowly walked over to the camp, "¡Hola! ¿Busco a Javier Escuella?" God you had hoped you said that right, someone had taught you some basics in Spanish during your trip here, but you couldn't really get it down. 

The men all had a wild look in their eyes, their hands hovering over their weapons ready to draw at any quick movements.

One of them looked you up and down and then said something to one of his comrades, and he went into a tent, and he came out with Javier. 

"Javier?" You had questioned, he looked different, maybe not physically but, he looked tired his eyes held something so sad inside of them. 

"(Y/N?)"

"Yes, it's me, I-"

"Why are you here?" He almost grimaced at you, all the memories came flooding back. 

"I-I needed to know how you were." 

"Leave."


	2. Requiem

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is basically just a feels bad man sorta thing,, I think i wanna make this angsty as fuck. Also I know the formatting looks fucked up i can't fix it sorry lol

“Leave? Why would I leave?” Your eyebrows were knit together in anger, and confusion.  
“Cause I want you to get the fuck out of here!” He was getting angrier by the second  
“What did I do to you?”  
He didn’t respond, he didn’t want you to see him like this, working with the government, being dirty, not dressed well. No longer having the same comforting air around him.  
“Please, I looked all over West Elizabeth for you.”  
Still no response, he went back into his tent. He couldn’t stop imagining what his life would look like if you and him ran away from Dutch together, would you have kids? A house? He wondered if you still thought of him, and if he should let you think of him the same.  
“Please! Javier! I miss you!” You were starting to get desperate, no matter how embarrassing this was, you still hoped he cared deep down, to at least look at you for longer than a second and not to look away in pain.  
His men were starting to get more and more irritated by your yelling, they had their hands on their guns and they were about to threaten you to get out or get shot, but before they could even start, Javier’s tent flaps opened, and he stepped out. He slowly looked at you, he tried to give you a smile. His mood swings were very out of character.  
“Ok, come in.”  
He came over to you and brought you to his tent, and sat you down on one of the boxes he had in there.  
“So, what are you here for?” He seemed impatient again, eager to push you out of his life again, so he can finally forget.  
“I missed you.” You admitted shamefully, as if you hadn’t just screamed in front of everyone that earlier.  
“I know, me too.”  
“Honestly, I don’t know why I came here.” You paused, and looked at him in the eyes again, he averted his eyes from yours. He felt embarrassed that you had to see him like this.  
“I’m sorry,” He started slowly he still couldn’t look you in the eyes, “For what happened with Dutch.”  
Your chest tightened at him menionting it. You couldn’t forgive him. No matter how much you wanted to, what he did was unforgivable.  
“It’s already said and done.”  
You both sat together quietly, it wasn’t a comfortable silence either, It was borderline painful.  
“I can’t stop thinking, about what we could’ve been, if I hadn’t been so stupid.” He had finally looked at you again. “Maybe we’d have a family, a nice plot of land, who knows?”  
“I-I still want that, I know it’s crazy, but Javier, even after all these years, I still love you.”  
If his eyes could pop out of his head like a cartoon character they would. Of course he still loved you, but he felt it was wrong, he had taken you for granted before, and who’s to say it wouldn’t happen again. He didn’t trust himself.  
“Javier, do you feel the same? I know it’s a lot to ask of you espically since I came out of nowhere.”  
He wanted to kiss you so badly right now. You looked just as beautiful as he remembered. He wanted to make everything better, he wanted to prove to you that he regrets it. That he regrets leaving you. He couldn’t, he felt like he hadn’t deserved to kiss you. Your hands weren’t any cleaner than his, but you, you were so much better.  
You’d have to argue with him though, you always thought he was much more honorable, he led a revolution, he wasn’t bad, he was courageous. You weren’t here for a quick kiss or fuck though, you weren’t sure if his intentions were to just have a chat, and move on. You wouldn’t blame him, you have tried to forget too.  
“Can I kiss you?” All defenses were dropped now, he was truly vulnerable, he thought he’d never be like this again, but here you were.  
“Yes.”  
He didn’t hesitate, he came over to you and kissed you deeply, he kissed you like you’ve been away from each other for years. Which you have. When he pulled away both of you had watery eyes, this is what he remembers, love, true love.  
“Please, don’t leave me again.” You had dropped all defenses too, the air in the tent similar to when you two were together in Dutch’s gang. Tears were threatening to fall from your eyes.  
He hesitated, he didn’t want to hurt you again, but it would hurt you more if he didn’t follow his heart.  
“I won’t, never again, I promise.”  
He held you close, it felt more intimate than your kiss somehow. You haven’t felt this safe since the last time you saw him. He knew how to make you feel ok, and being apart from him was one of the hardest things for you to do.  
He thought the same, being apart from you was like ripping out his heart and throwing it into the ocean, maybe it’ll never return, and he didn’t blame it.  
After catching up for a couple hours, you both had retired to bed, you were tempted to sleep with him on the bed but, you were moving too quick, what happens if he disappears tomorrow.


End file.
